ORLANDO (The Borowitz Report)—In an effort to establish his foreign-policy credentials, Ron DeSantis urged all NATO countries to “immediately withdraw” from Disney World’s “It’s a Small World” ride.
Claiming that Disney had perpetrated an “illegal woke invasion of Florida,” the Governor identified the “Small World” ride as the “tip of Disney’s liberal spear.”
“The Evil Empire of Disney is trying to spread the ideology that ‘there’s so much that we share,’ ” he said. “Not on my watch, there isn’t.”
He said that, if NATO did not withdraw from “It’s a Small World,” he would instruct Florida state troopers to raid the ride and “seize your dolls.”
“It will not be a world of laughter,” he warned. “It will be a world of tears.”
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