Racism Outshines Platinum Jubilee

There was widespread astonishment in royal circles Monday after it was
confirmed that Meghan and Harry left Britain by private jet before the
platinum jubilee celebrations were finished, delivering a snub to the
queen and organizers of the event. A friend of the royals expressed
the irritation felt by many at what was perceived by some to be a
churlish and attention-grabbing departure, telling The Daily Beast on
Monday, “So much for not overshadowing the queen. Would it have killed
them to wait a few hours?”—the Daily Beast

Wow! Racism brought some of its most iconic looks to the Platinum Jubilee, effectively stealing the show. Despite the palace’s best efforts to pretend that it wasn’t there, people couldn’t stop marvelling at Racism’s stunning choices over the course of the weekend, which gave us plenty of style to discuss.

On Thursday, for the Trooping of the Colour, Racism wore one designer exclusively: Erasure. Racism made its arrival in a sleek look by Erasure—a barely-there, minimal and modern ensemble of not allowing Meghan and Harry to join the Royal Family on the balcony, a choice so understated that some might have had trouble recognizing Racism at all.

On Friday, at a service of thanksgiving for Her Majesty at St. Paul’s Cathedral, Racism, attending with its partner, Colonialism, turned things up a notch in haute couture by the House of Anxiety, a dazzling coat composed of thousands of individual boos directed toward Meghan and Harry as they entered the church. When asked about the custom creation, House of Anxiety responded, “White supremacy demands hating the other, and hating the other is the moment.”

The House also confirmed that, beneath its coat, Racism wore vintage Anxiety, a dress as asymmetrical as Meghan and Harry being seated behind the “senior” royals, its bias cut a nod to Dorothy Dandridge not being able to eat in the restaurants where she sang.

Altogether, Racism’s presence at the Jubilee gave us a pitch-perfect tutorial on the staying power of inequity. No matter how fashion-forward, keen observers had to notice Racism’s timeless and enduring standards. For instance, Prince Andrew’s absence being excused by his “COVID diagnosis” while Meghan and Harry were criticized for leaving early. All in all, Racism’s looks were utterly savage—almost as savage, bloody, and oppressive as British history itself.

After such a stunning turn at the Jubilee, we can’t wait to see where Racism will go next. And we won’t have to wait too long: it’s an election year in America, and we’re on the edge of our seats waiting to see if Racism will follow a hot summer with an October surprise.