The New York Times’ “The Hunt”: Dating-App Edition

“This Brooklyn Woman Didn’t Need a Man with a Job or a Car, but a Personality Would Be Nice: Who Did She Choose?”

“She Was Tired of Dating D.J.s, but She Didn’t Know Who Else Was Out There: Which App Did She Try Next?”

“This Los Angeleno’s Options Were a Ninety-Five-Minute Commute, a Diehard Louis C.K. Fan, or Permanent Singledom: What Was the Verdict?”

“She Didn’t Need a Tall Guy, but She Wanted Room for a Few of Her Preferences to Be Observed in the Relationship: Would She Need to Lower Her Standards to Find Someone?”

“This Chicagoan Has a Ph.D. and a Six-Figure Income: Can She Find a Man Who Doesn’t Feel Threatened by That?”

“This San Francisco Woman Wanted to Swap Her Rental for a More Long-Term Situation, but Her Options Were an Ex Who Swore He’d Changed, a Friend’s Ex Who Also Swore He’d Changed, and a Random Dude Who Was Probably, Statistically Speaking, as Bad as the Other Two: Who Would It Be?”

“Seeking a Single Man with the Basics in Brooklyn or Manhattan, and by ‘Basics’ She Means Most of His Teeth and the Ability to Apologize Once Per Season: Were There Any Left?”

“Would Anyone Care That Her Credit Score Was Seven Hundred and Forty? No—and Why Should They?”

“This Austin Woman Wanted a Man Who’d Ask Her at Least One Question on the First Date: Was She Being Unrealistic? (‘Just Wait Till the Second Date Before Making a Decision,’ Friends Said)”

“Exploring the Possibility of Not Feeling Bad About Herself: Would It Take Her Forty-seven More Swipes to Find Someone Reasonably Nice?”

“She Received Four Dick Pics the Weekend Her Younger Sister Got Engaged: Would She Be Alone Forever?”

“Her Options Were Zero, Zilch, Nada: There Was No One Halfway Decent on Any of These Apps”

“Seeking a Fresh Start: Which Early-Two-Thousands Drama Would She Rewatch First?”

“Finding the Therapist She Always Wanted: Would Her Insurance Cover It?”

“She Always Thought She Was a Monogamist, but Then Her Therapist Mentioned Feeld: Could She Swing It? Also, Why Did Her Therapist Do That?”

“A Couple Invited Her to Be Their Third: Why Did She Find It So Calming to Have Two People Stroke Her Hair Simultaneously? This Was Much Better Than Hinge”

“She Had Four Hundred Thousand Dollars, a Dog, a Stable Career, and Several Kindhearted Swingers on Speed Dial: She Decided She Didn’t Need a Boyfriend, She Had Enough, Hurray!”

“Now She Could Turn Her Attention Toward Buying a Home in New York City: Surely This Would Be Easier Than Finding a Partner, Let’s Just Check Zillow—Never Mind” ♦